If I could only dip my nuggets into one sauce for the rest of my life, it would be ranch. Specifically Hidden Valley Ranch—although I have tried every major fast food ranch and crowned a winner, too—which I’ve been dipping into and dressing salads with for decades. It was the only condiment in the fridge that was name brand when I was growing up, as I lived in a non-brand-loyal household of generic stuff. But I could tell a difference in how tangy, creamy, herby, and slightly sweet HVR was compared to other brands and unworthy substitutes.
I’ve made my own ranch—including seven different recipes for “cranch” in my cookbook Big Dip Energy—and love to, when I have time. But in a pinch, Hidden Valley is always there to save the day with reliable ranch. I’ve even used Costco-sized bottles to fill a ranch fountain for a birthday party. I never thought I’d love anything more than the original Hidden Valley Ranch…until the brand released seven new flavors in one incredible day. I was lucky enough to taste test the new flavors—and two kinda-new (Dill Pickle and Buffalo, released in April 2023) flavors—in different dishes, ranging from popcorn to pizza and lots of wings at an event in NYC. But after tasting them all again individually, I was shocked to discover that I liked one of the new flavors more than the original. And when mixed with another new flavor, it’s a dip of epic proportions.
For simplicity, I tried each of the new ranch flavors plain, with a ridged potato chip, and with a thin piece of carrot for maximum dip-to-dipper ratio. Below are my rankings, from last place to first place.
Book Reviews by the Reluctant Retiree 